WOooOooow

Maybe i should have taken the my internet's server disconnection as a sign. But if you have something to say at 3:45 in the morning, and can still say in in the light of day...well, then it's worth sharing...

I always assumed that people who outwardly advertised their happiness were cruel...that they were inadvertently jabbing me with their smiles and laughter. Their success magnified my problems (I think that sentence is the definition of selfish, go look it up). I was used to the "if they're happy, i'm happy" crap, because overall i was happy (convincing, right?) but i was...really. But the "hey, i just got a B in physics" and the "I finally have my license" or even the "i'm having the best day...ever" thing was really starting to bring me down. Like 80% of me was jumping up and down, knowing they deserved it, and the other twenty was throwing a full-blown pity party (when i say party i mean a "my parents are away for the weekend party"[not that i know what that's like{wow, i just used brackets cause i have so many sub-thoughts...irony?}]).

So yeah, practically a pity rave. Sad, huh? But...I'm done. And most of me knows that I've been done for a long time (the twenty percent is just getting the Memo). haha...wow...wow. I finally figured out that happy people cannot help going unnoticed. Not because they want attention, but because you cannot contain happiness. Just like love, it is impossible to squeeze happiness into a box, or fold it into an ever-decreasing triangle. Happiness is odd. It sings and cries. It's loud, smelly, and misshapen. And best of all, happiness is shared.

That is why "I love my friends" should be written (in caps), and said (in a scream) instead of repeated inside your head. I LOVE MY FRIENDS. Only a friend would continue to read this and not think i was a wackjob. So friends...i'm gonna start sucking less. Yup, it's about time. But that means you have to make a promise. You have to promise to never leave me, because i will never leave you. And know that i won't judge you. And above all, open up. If you're a true friend i can know anything about you, not just anything but everything. I love how unfocused this thing is...and how hypocritical i am...but i'm sure you'll forgive me.

So here it is, in all its over-due, epiphany stained glory, a happy post.

It's Good to See You Again...

Large breaks are so awkward...giant stretches of complete silence. How do you resume like nothing ever happened?
I thought about just typing yunji. period. Or perhaps dirka, dirka. But maybe the best way to get back into the swing of things is to be completely spontane- BAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHM.-ous. I love ice breakers...

well, i hope you enjoyed that. And if you didn't we need to hang out.